Hercules and Beauty Queens

I remembered! Thanks to TVGuide.com and an article on the fabulous Kevin Sorbo, aka Hercules from the much loved 1990s syndicated cable program, I remembered.

Part One: Hercules

Class reunions are a strange and increasingly unnecessary part of our culture. With the Instant Messaging and the Facebooking and the cellphones kids use nowadays, everyone keeps up with everyone. In fact, I would argue everyone keeps up with everyone too much and most people's development gets stunted by the fact they are still knee deep in high school politics. However, this did not stop me from attending My Lovely Ladyfriend's fifth year high school reunion two weeks ago.

Honestly, I now see the appeal. The appeal isn't to talk with people you've kept in touch with, it's seeing where life has taken the people you haven't talked to since high school. Being that I am two years older than My Lady, I knew many of her classmates. One of them in particular, was an underclassmen who always felt the need to try and impress me simply because my parents procreated via tube and science two years prior to his. High school. Dumb.

However, his need to impress me evidently continues. I went to speak with him during the reunion because everyone seemed to be avoiding him. I asked him the standard mid twenties question, "So, what are you up to?" He went on to tell me about how, "Oh I'm still at Iowa State; it's taken awhile; but now I know what I want to do." I won't go in more detail, let's just say he spent five minutes of my life justifying the last five years of his. Things look up for him however, as he told me he has three job leads with either Lucas' Industrial Light and Magic, Pixar, and Disney. This impressed me. I congratulated him and asked him how he got himself hooked up.

"I know people in the business."

"Oh who?"

"Well," he said, switching his beer from one hand to the other and doing a cool guy pose, "Okay me saying this is just being a dick."

"Saying what."

"Well my third cousin, he's Kevin Sorbo."

"Awesome! So you guys talk often?"

"Actually, we never have spoke. He lives in Australia, I don't know him at all."

I did leave impressed-impressed someone's means of impressing people at a high school reunions is referencing a C-List actor he is distantly related to and never spoken with. Good times.

Part Two: Beauty Queens

Let's move on from my arrogance to someone else's. As many of you have inferred, I am currently training for a different position I really don't like that much within a company I really don't like that much with trainers I really don't like that much. I've always heard it takes a special type of person to work retail. I did not realize what type of special they meant.

As with all trainings or group events, we have to have an "icebreaking" activity each time someone new comes to train us. On Day One last week, our female trainer said, "Let's go around the room and say something people might not know about us." She then started with the person next to her, so she would be last to speak. Everyone said generic trivia about themselves (really, that's a stupid icebreaking activity, is anyone going to get that in depth? my name is harold, and i once killed a man with my thoughts.) When we get back to the Trainer Lady, she says, "Okay, this is weird for me to say, but I was the former Ms. Iowa. I tell you because most people sit there and try to figure out why they recognize me; then I get mauled at lunch with people asking me if I was a beauty queen."

Right, I'm sure that happens all the time.